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Apparently, PEDs don't work on flu-like symptoms. Alex Rodriguez (AKA: A-Flu) did not appear at his investigatory hearing on Friday due to 'flu-like symptoms' and may not testify at all before arbitrator Fredric Horowitz. And yet, one of his flunkies was quoted thusly, "The guy really wants to testify. He's dying to tell his side of the story. But his head is all clogged up right now." Frankly, we think he's been "all clogged up" since he left Seattle. If The Fraudulent One's 211-game suspension is upheld, it will allow The Evil Ones to go after free agents with what would have been his salary. It's tough to know who to root for on this one.